Is God Merciful or Just?

Sometimes it's hard to know if my thoughts are from God or are they from my emotions and brokenness. We spend our lives on earth trying to figure God out and just when we think we know Him and have His ways pegged, He shows us a different viewpoint. God never contradicts His word, and He never changes....but He sure is a big, big God and has so much more depth than I can even BEGIN to wrap my head around.

One moment I see in the old testament where He is just and no one can come near Him because He is holy. The next moment I see Him calling out to all people, every tribe and every nation and His desire is to forgive and cover the sins of the people.

I am learning that the cross has the final word. The sacrifice of Jesus made a way when there was no way. The entire Bible is true...every single part, even when parts seem to contradict other parts. This is why we have to keep digging and learning and allowing God to show us the whole picture.

I want to know about ALL of God. I want to know what makes Him weep and what makes Him angry and when will He show mercy and when will He display judgement? He is righteous and just AND He is loving and forgiving.

There are times I am crying and truly wallowing over injustices and wrong doing, seeing sin as God sees it and other times I am crying for God to make my heart like His to embrace forgiveness.

I cannot say I know it all. The closer I get to the Lord the more I feel like I haven't even begun to understand Him. He's so amazingly higher than I and wiser and more loving. One thing I do know; I will love Him and stand in awe of the fact that I CAN'T understand Him fully and completely. He is GOD and I am His creation. He is the MASTER teacher and I am still a student. At the end of the day I am just thankful that He embraces me in spite of my questions and even my misunderstandings. He is teaching me and I beg Him to help me learn.

Oh how my heart loves Him so. I just want to follow Him all the days of my life and be a pleasing disciple of Jesus forever and ever. He amazes me and thrills me to no end.